Peeling away

Here lately I have felt passionless. For those of you that know me, you know this is rare and strange for me. I have no desire for my classes, or the future, or worst of all God. I have been realizing that God and I have lost touch. God has been breaking me with my family, my friends, certainty about the future, its all a little unstable. Ok, a lot unstable.

All the things I find security in are not here anymore and the lightbulb went off. I am trying to do it all myself again. I do this over and over. Try to take control. I heard the song below on my iPod today and it really spoke to me. In the midst of my 6 projects, finals, my sick gradparents, my friends, my job and finals, I have forgotten that God is here with me. Today when I heard this song, I felt my heart break. I am returning wounded and humbled. I am ready for Him to "rend" me. I need Him to.


Rend- Jimmy Needham

You’ve been tarnished
And you’ve been stained
And all the varnish
you’ve used to cover up with is peeling away

Yet even now, return to me
with nothing less Than your wounded, broken heart
And cling to Me, your gracious King
Be shattered glass of empty jars
and rend Rend, rend, rend Rend your hearts

I don’t need a grand display
Show me that your heart has changed
I don’t need a show
Only just to know your own heart breaks